Welcome to the SQ World Tour! It’s basically a new fancy way of telling you I’ve got some non-UK treats to try out, so today we’re kicking off with some Polish goodies, okay, so admittedly I cheated a bit with my first “World Tour” installment as I’ve never actually been to Poland before, but my local Tesco has such a good selection that I figured it would be a great start to this multi-cultural segment of this blog. Expect less of a history lesson with these and more of a casual tasting, let’s start!
Grzeski
Oh my goodness it’s the Polish Blue Riband! This, however looks a lot more substantial, it’s a really simple but fantastic combination of dark chocolate and wafer, usually I’m skeptical about wafer products but this is an absolute delight, and there’s little else to it, great start!
Grzeski gofree
I’ve got no idea what the “gofree” means, perhaps gluten free? or maybe just lower calorie? Anyway, think of this as a topsy-turvy Kinder Bueno, the wafer is on the outside and the chocolate (along with not as much praline) is stuck on the inside. again, an extremely nice little thing, I love Bueno and this is just as good if not even better because it’s larger and that’s always important to a pig such as myself. I’m incredibly impressed with the “Grzeski” duo, if this were the foreign treat World Cup, Poland would be topping the group, mostly because I haven’t featured another country yet, but never mind, let’s move on.
Jezyki Classic
As if by magic, my whole heart sinks to the floor when I spot all those nuts flying around the packaging, I’m assuming this will be their equivalent to a Snickers, only a bit flatter and lumpier. Oh god, I’m just throwing a quick disclaimer, this is probably very nice for people who like nuts, so as you should be aware of by now, this entire thing is subjective, as it should be. If I’d actually read the description first instead of guessing, this is nothing like a Snickers, it has a cookie base and instead of peanuts it has hazelnuts and also throws in “rice crips” apparently, this new information has softened the blow slightly, let’s give it a go I suppose.
Oh my lord, it’s actually lovely, you can barely tell there’s any hazelnut at all, big hit of caramel and the rice crispies though, it’s absolutely spot on! Poland, what are you doing to me?! This is the first chocolate bar with nuts in that I’ve enjoyed, ever, and I did check that it wasn’t just nut flavouring, it said “hazelnuts”. Maybe it’s just peanuts that make me gag?
I’m not sure, all I know is that Jezyki Classic is top notch, well done, Poland!
Jezyki Kokos
Now, I know Jezyki seem like miracle workers when it comes to turning my hate for nuts on its head, but my hatred for coconut is one that surely, absolutely cannot be rectified, this will be the one that tarnishes the entire review. Instead of replacing the hazelnut, the dessicated coconut is added to the bar to “complement it”, but I doubt there will be any compliments from this blogger, here goes ultimate torture…
Jesus christ, you can definitely taste the coconut, but it’s not at all a strong sensation, and you can’t feel the dessicated pieces much at all, and the hint soon goes away and returns back to the taste of the previous bar, most importantly, I didn’t have a sudden urge to spit it out or vomit, which is my usual experience with coconut.
OH MY GOD, THEY MADE A COCONUT PRODUCT THAT I COULD ACTUALLY CONSUME, WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON, POLAND?!
I did have two more Polish bars to review (one of them has alcohol in, exciting) , but without making this article as long as buggery, I’m going to save them for a later date. but to conclude this first SQ World Tour to Poland, I enjoyed everything, it’s been the most positive and upbeat article I think I’ve ever written, and perhaps the most surprising, I honestly never imagined I’d be sat here telling you guys I liked something with nuts and even managed to tolerate something that was graced with coconut.
What’s next? are they going to make me lust over liquorice? Now that WOULD something.
Nevertheless, Poland, these treats are magnificent, and you should be proud.
Na razie!
SQ 2 